How to Simplify Your Hospitality (Hospitality 101)

in the spirit of slowing down for the holidays and reducing our collective stress level, let’s take some simple steps together to simplify our hospitality so we can spend time with our people without losing our sanity!

PRIORITIZE CONNECTION

The number one goal of hosting people in any capacity is to foster connection.

Sure, it’s great if the dishes are pretty, the food is delicious, the room is beautifully decorated, and the music is spot-on.

But ultimately, our guests care most about spending time with us.

So this year, I’m giving you permission to prioritize connection, whatever that means to you.

Maybe it means making simpler food so you don’t have to spend so much time in the kitchen.

Maybe it means asking others to help so you’re not running the show single-handedly.

Maybe it means forgoing the elaborate dinner party in favor of something simpler and more low-key.

ROCK JUST A COUPLE THINGS

You also have my full permission to intentionally choose which things you’re going to say “yes” to and which ones you’re going to say “no” to.

We all have our strengths, and this is where you get to celebrate yours and let others contribute theirs.

We don’t have to do all the things. We can just do some of the things, the most important things, the very best things.

Perhaps that’s decorating a beautiful tree. Or making delicious food. Or creating the best party playlist ever. Or planning fun activities that everyone magically loves.

But chances are, we’re not good at all those things at the same time. So let’s leverage our strengths by doing what we’re good at. And we can ask others to contribute their unique gifts to make it a collective effort that’s far better than our solo attempts could ever be.

Join the Cheerful Cherished Christmas Challenge to discover how YOU can SAVOR the season instead of stressing about it! Learn more here.

JUST LOVE PEOPLE

No matter what happens, just love on your people.

That’s a mantra I have to keep repeating to myself as I plan and execute various parties and get-togethers.

It seems like it’s a law of the universe that nothing goes quite as planned. Guests might all arrive late (or early), people might forget what they were planning to contribute, the games we plan might not go over so well, there might be awkward silences, and things seldom go according to schedule.

That’s all okay.

Because it’s about connection, remember?

The goal is to love people, no matter what happens.

“I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” - Maya Angelou

INVITE THE RIGHT PEOPLE

One thing that really helps with creating fun get-togethers is inviting the right people to them in the first place!

If you consider who you’re inviting and make sure you have a few different types of people, you’ll set yourself up to not have to carry the entire conversation or worry about it hitting a lull when you step out of the room to refill the appetizers.

The bubbly personality
This person is generally loud and vivacious. he or she will keep the conversation (and the party) going, even when there’s a threat of a lull. They’re full of stories, anecdotes, movie references, and connections to make no matter who they’re talking to.
The listener
This person is typically on the more reserved side, but don’t let their quietness scare you or fool you into thinking they aren’t a valuable component to your party. If you fill a room with bold, loud people, all you’ll have is a noisy, overwhelming room full of people talking over each other in their excitement. You need to balance the loud conversationalists with quieter listeners.
The conversation starter
This person is good at asking questions. He or she might be loud and vivacious or quieter and more shy, but they turn the focus on others to get them involved. They know how to draw others out and make them feel included.

This, of course, isn’t meant to be a perfect formula, thinking you need to un-invite people who don’t fit in one of these categories or working to even out the ratios. It’s merely a guide to help you consider how you can create the most fun group for your get-togethers!

LET GO OF PERFECT

One of the main reasons we stress about hospitality is because we’re under the impression that we have to do it all perfectly.

But we don’t have to do anything perfectly because we’re imperfect human beings.

We can welcome people into our messy lives and messy homes without fear of judgment, knowing that their lives and homes are likely just as messy!

We can feel free to host even if our homes aren’t picture-perfect or if we’re not great cooks or if we don’t have all the supplies needed. We can ask for help or simply accept that we don’t have to do it all by ourselves.

We’re prioritizing connection, not impression here.

We’re focusing on spending time with our people, not stressing about every last detail trying to make it all perfect.

So go ahead and make those plans! And let me know how they go!